Late Night Rambling

Me, manipulated in the #photolab app

It’s 1:29am and I can’t sleep. I hurt all over, and I’ve been having vertigo and migraines with all the symptoms that go with it.

I’m posting from my phone so who knows how this will turn out. I doubt I’ll be able to edit it very well. I apologise for errors ahead of time.

It’s been over 2 months now since Stuart got laid off, I’m not tired of him, but I do miss my private time. However, I’ve been having such an increase in symptoms it’s probably best that I’m not alone all that much.

I’m tired. So very tired.

I’ve had a non-stop migraine for almost two months now and I, at least partially, blame my doctor. I had a tele-health appointment with her the beginning of May, right when we were increasing my Spravato treatments back up to two a week and I had every reason to believe that my migraines would get better again. They didn’t, they got worse, and I have no rescue medication that works. I got in touch with her less than two weeks after my appointment to ask for help and she said I need another appointment, so I’ve been waiting two month! The soonest they could get me in was July 17th. I’m finally going to see her next Friday. Now I have a Status Migraine, that’s a bitch to treat. I don’t know if this would have happened anyway, but I feel if I’m in this kind of situation she needs to take care of her patient, so I’m searching for a new doctor. I’m tired of her never being available when I need her.

I had the freakiest, thing happen to me earlier. I was sitting on the toilet and it felt like the toilet started moving under me. Normally when I have vertigo it feels like I’m moving, or the whole room is swaying/rocking..ect. it has never felt like the seat under me is wiggling. Soon I did feel like I was moving, well, it felt like my brain was. It still does just a little, much more if I move my head. I’m so grateful I have an amazing husband who will help me off the toilet and to the bed when things like this happen.

When I got to the bed I could literally feel my brain trying to spin in my head. My eyes weren’t all the way spinning, my vision was a little off, but not like it can be. I rarely have that sensation any more, thank goodness, it’s really hard not to throw up when you see the world spinning around you. It’s hard enough as it is. Right now, When I move my head it feel as if my brain rotates and moves around in my head. My internal gyroscope doesn’t work. My vision spins for a few seconds, and I can feel bile coming up my throat. The only hope for sleep is to lie perfectly still and hope I don’t turn over in my sleep until this has passed.

Now it’s after 2am, I don’t know if the pain will allow me to sleep, but I’m going to try.


15 thoughts on “Late Night Rambling

    1. I was asleep. Then awake. Then asleep. πŸ˜‰. Today is better. 🀞🀞It continues. Thank you. Stuart has already called a new doctor for me. The only other headache specialist within 2 hours of me. Luckily she’s with the University here, I hope she’s good, if not, I’m heading to Mayo!

      Liked by 2 people

    1. Hello!! I’m sorry I haven’t been around. I hope things are as well as possible with you. I did sleep some. And Stuart had already called a new doctor. 🀞🀞
      Love and hugs ❣️


  1. Oh Wen! I’m so sorry you’re going through this. I hope you’re able to find a new doctor who listens to you and has some better ideas for getting your symptoms under control. Sending you lots of gentle hugs and positive energy! ❀

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you my friend. Stuart has already put in a call to anew doctor, if she doesn’t work I’m going to Mayo, it’s over two hours away, but if I must. Love to you my dear.πŸ’•πŸ’•

      Liked by 1 person

  2. So sorry you are experiencing these episodes. I just sent you an email which seems out of context after reading this.
    Your image manipulation provides a sense of how “off-balance” you must feel.
    I know two hours is a long drive for you, but having the Mayo clinic as an option is helpful. Your headache doctor seems like a pain . . . in the head, neck and ass. Hope the new one is better.
    Very, extremely gentle hugs.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you love. I wouldn’t hesitate about Mayo if not for the pandemic and the fear that when S gets a new job he may have a hard time getting off to take me. But this new lady is a real possibility. I just hope she’s more accommodating when her patients are in crisis. I can handle big strong hugs if you can. 😊 It actually feels good most days. Love you. xo


  3. I wish you had more options where doctors are concerned. We have the same problem here with different specialists. Not enough to begin with. Some go to the States or back home, where ever home is once they’ve done their training and any required work. Sometimes it is such hard work trying to be as healthy as we can when the crap is coming at us from different angles and lack of available care just makes things worse.

    Also, sending the Sandman to visit. He can help with pain too, right?

    As always, hugs and love to you and Stuart. ❀❀❀

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Wendy, As always I am so distressed after reading about your migraines. I can’t understand why so many of us suffer and no one can help us. I pray for you every night…..when I can’t sleep. Good luck with the new doctor! Mo

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I love you so. I have a new treatment plan. I will write about it soon. When I can come out of the dark long enough. Starts on Thursday. 🀞🀞 Thought are with you more than you could possibly know. πŸ’•πŸ’•


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