Normally when I’m not feeling great, I turn to my blog. When I’m happy and want to share, I turn to my blog. When I’m mad, I turn to my blog. Well, you get the picture.
Lately, I just haven’t felt like it.
I’ve thought of much to say, but it all sounds like a big jumble to me. No real coherent thought. I’ve been happy, sad, mad, confused, in pain, sick as a friggin’ dog (where did that saying come from anyway? Or Weak as cat pee? that person evidently never smelled cat pee!)…see what I mean…all over the place.
I do feel I owe an update. Today is day 12 of feeling like crap. I’ve decided to name my Slosh Head – Alvida – after a famous female pirate. My head feels like I’m living on a very rocky boat, I’m sure the first Alvida (often spelled Alvilda) spent many days on a rocky boat, hence the namesake.
Alvida cannot seem to get her “sea” (or in our case, very rocky land) legs. We wooble..but unlike the Weebles we can fall down.
I had a-n-o-t-h-e-r lumbar puncture (LP) on Monday. This time it actually appears they caught the high pressure before I had a blow out! It was the highest it’s ever been..then Dr. Gray said something that confused me (of course that’s pretty easy to do right now), she said, that the pressure doesn’t take into account volume, and my volume should be higher right now because of the excess fluid I still have after the surgery. So, can we trust this LP at all? She did a little testing. She added in 3cc’s of CSF (cerebrospinal fluid pressure), and I started to get a headache. She started to take some out, and I started to feel better, then she took out more and I felt weird. She took out 10cc’s all together. (I think that includes the 3cc’s she added….again, confusion).
I made Dr. Gray a piece of art. I’d been working on it for a while, if you’ve been on my blog Create To Heal you have seen it in progress. I still needed to color quite a bit of it, but I finished it just in time. She loved it! Just gushed. Said she was going to frame it and just went on and on. I’m glad it made her happy. She also said, we could come by and see her anytime, I didn’t have to be getting a hole in my back. LOL.
While in recovery I started to feel MUCH better. I could turn my head without getting sick, I was happy. Then I got up to leave. Ugh…not as good. After we got home and I ate dinner the world began to move again…Dang-it! But Dr. Gray said it would take some time for things to level out. She put me on a small dose of Topamax, to see if we can keep the pressure lower, we will up the dose as needed. Hopefully, we’ll figure this out and I’ll be able to move around soon with out triggering a full blown vertigo attack. Not feeling like I’m on a boat would be nice, but not spinning some every single day would be a miracle right now. 12 Days! TWELVE DAYS! But I can handle it. I know I can. If it ends up that this is the way it will be I’ll figure out a way. Perhaps I’ll need to wear a neck brace so I won’t move my head to fast? We’ll figure out a way that I can deal with it some how, some way. Wow, I just really surprised myself! I haven’t been feeling the most optimistic lately.
After the coldest night I think we’ve had in a very long time (it was in the 20’s F here), we went to the library the next day. Guess what we saw out front?
That’s all for now.
Alvida is telling me that she is not going to allow any more!
Here’s to getting my
sea legs…I hope.