Random Phrase from a Book….Junk Stores! #HAWMC 18

Today’s Prompt: Open a Book. Choose a book and open it to a random page and point to a phrase.  Use that phrase to get you writing today. Free write for 15-20 without stopping.

I’m always reading.  One book I’ve been reading on and off for a while is I Know What I Like (a visual autobiography by) Vincent Price.  (one of the coolest people who ever lived!!!  Just saying!!)   I’ve had the book for a few years now, and normally I fly through books, but this book I’m savoring, and enjoying every morsel of it.

I just opened the book closed my eyes and pointed to a phrase…..

local thrift store interior - Pennies for Change, Durham, NC

“The junk store still holds a ghastly fascination for me.”

I’ve always enjoyed shopping in thrift (or junk) stores.   Yard sales were also a fascination for me.  I would go with my friend and her mother to scour the neighborhoods for the best yard sales, my friend would begrudgingly go, I eagerly awaited the search for the newest treasure.   Some days I may find nothing of interest.  Normally I found at least a book I just had to have!  Often I came away with treasures I just knew others would love and hold dear, often to be disappointed when they were less than impressed by my “used” gift.

As I got older I depended on the thrift store to supplement my wardrobe, and I loved it!  No I couldn’t afford the fancy clothes many of the kids wore at the private school I went attended, I was lucky to get a few fundamental pieces, then I discovered thrift stores!  Why would I pay $50 for a name brand sweater I could find for $2?  Having used clothes never bothered me.  I was picky about what I bought, and no one would have known if I didn’t tell them, but I bragged, and still do.  Someone will complement me on an outfit and I’ll say, “I paid $12 for this whole outfit, including the shoes!!   In high school it wasn’t cool, but in college….times changed.

A photo of a chair close to my favorite chair, but mine swiveled!

I was an art student.  I bought all my clothes from thrift stores, loved to create my own look!  (wonder where that ability went?)  I often bought old paintings and white washed them and painted over the old painting.  Cheap canvas!!  I found many things to use for art projects!  For the artist, a thrift or junk store is a paradise.  My furniture was mostly thrift store items.  I loved them.  A bright yellow half circle leather chair from the 1970’s – that was my favorite.  I remember needing storage and an end table so I bought a bunch of old suitcases, cleaned them up, stored things in them, stacked them up and that was my table!  I still think that was a cool table.

Ahhhh, I remember my roommate bought a mink coat for $10.  It was such a wreak, and we were all a thither over the idea that someone would kill animals for a coat, but they had, and she felt that she was saving this poor pelt.  What a mess.  I don’t know what she ended up doing with it, I hope a good burial, but I’ll never forget that poor, poor mink coat we found.

I’ve found some gorgeous art books, I have a huge collection of old art books that have the prints in them.  They are gorgeous.

Now, before we buy anything new we go to the thrift store first.  I still buy a lot of my clothes used.  Little house hold gadgets….

I have found that most thrift stores are not the treasure houses they used to be, it’s more “trendy” to shop in thrift stores now.  I haven’t seen good used furniture in our local thrift stores in a long time, and when I do, the prices are way too high.

Still, I love to go on a treasure hunt in a junk or thrift store, I do not believe the fascination will ever die for me.   (as long as I take an allergy pill first, whew the dust will get you!)

“Ummmmm, honey, think we can go thrift store shopping this weekend?”


Lesson Learned the Hard Way – #HAWMC Day 17

Today’s Prompt: Learned the Hard Way. What’s a lesson you learned the hard way? Write about it for 15 today.

When I read this prompt I knew exactly what I’d write about, but not exactly sure the story I’d tell.

photo from http://www.terrygivens.com

I think with my health, the Greatest Lesson I Learned the Hard Way was that Doctors Do NOT always know, they CAN’T always fix you, and they WILL lie.

At 10 I broke my arm, it was a silly way to break a bone, so no one really thought it was broken, until the next day.  My shoulder, and my arm down to my elbow was black and blue.   Amazing. My mother felt such guilt because couldn’t believe it could be hurt that bad.  You see, I was climbing up the side of a hill, not a big hill, I grabbed a root that was sticking out to help pull me up, and it let go.  I fell back.  My feet were only inches from the ground.  I fell on my left arm.  It was my RIGHT arm that was hurting.  No one could understand.  No one but me, you see, I heard the bone snap.

We got to the Navy clinic, and they performed x-rays of my arm.  It caused quite a stir.  At one point, I counted 8 doctors in the room trying to get a glimpse of my x-rays.  They were confused.  Was my collar-bone broken too?  What was all those lines?  We better send her to a specialist.  So my whole side was immobilized, and we were sent to the big Navy Hospital, downtown Charleston, SC.  My mother hates to drive in traffic.  She didn’t get her license until after I was born.  But my father was at sea, she had to be brave, and be the only parent.  I remember being in much more pain during and after the x-rays.  Could they not be a little more gentle with a 10-year-old child?  and maybe give her something for pain?

So we arrived at the big Hospital, to this little girl, it was the biggest building I’d ever seen.  Again, there were many doctors looking at my x-rays.  Many having no idea what they were looking at.  Finally, saying this is very rare in such a young child.  And then taking my mother out in the hall.

That should have been my FIRST lesson – Doctor’s KEEP SECRETS.

When they returned my mother looked a bit confused, stunned, and scared.  I was told I had broken my arm.  But I also had a bone cyst.  A fibrous mass in my bone instead of a solid bone.  It was “NOTHING TO WORRY ABOUT”.  However, we needed to keep an eye on it, and I’d have to have a special cast.  I couldn’t have a whole cast, just a partial cast, because the cyst “needs to breathe” – I will never forget that phrase, I was only 10, but I thought, so I have some foreign thing living in me that has to breathe on its on?  What really was happening, was the tumor would make my arm swell and go down and swell and go down…ect….so a regular cast would not work.  And this was in 1973, so those fancy hard velcroed on casts weren’t around yet.  (actually, the very first one of those was a prototype made for me! after my surgery, isn’t that cool?)

So I broke my arm 5 times.  They kept saying they were watching it, and I wasn’t supposed to be doing anything strenuous because I could break it.  Um, Someone opened a door into me while I had a cast on (was days from getting it off) and broke my arm.  I don’t think I was being strenuous!  I never learned how to play any sports, I wasn’t allowed, I am so uncoordinated and so dumb about any sport activity.  I’ll be asked to play soft ball, I’m so embarrassed, I’ve tried to play, and volley ball…ect.  I can’t do it.  I simply have no eye hand coordination and I’m like a 2 year old learning to play a game.  But I digress.

Finally, I was almost 16, I had stopped growing, it was time to operate.  The bone in my right arm had not grown at all in the past 6 years!  They took some bone from my left hip, shaved it off from around the tip of the pelvic girdle.  (I know what you are thinking, she has chronic pelvic pain, I don’t think it’s from this, most of my pain if on the other side.)  They opened the upper right humerus of my right arm and scraped out the mass, and packed it full of the hip bone pieces.  So they had to fuse together.  (yes, my father says I can literally say, I carry my ass on my shoulder!)

So then the lies start to come together.  While I’m in the hospital I started to hear things.  Like the tumor that was removed.  And the malignancy.  I was given medication via IV, that had a little radiation symbol on it.  I got very sick.  And I was in the hospital for over a month.  I was never told the whole truth.  You know I’m not even sure my mother was told the whole truth.  I do think my father was.  It was that kind of times.  Tell the father, let him decide what to tell the family.  But from the things I got a hold of in the hospital, and the questions people answered before they thought about it….it sounds like, I had a tumor.  Yes, this I do know, I did hear the doctors say that…well, over hear.   I also over heard from the nurses when they thought I was sleeping.   It was mostly benign, but had some malignant cells.  I handled the chemo and radiation treatment well.  “It’s a good thing they got it when they d

That quote still haunts me.  They waited 6 years for my bone to grow.  If they had operated earlier, I probably would have had NO CANCER.  I would not have lost so much of my childhood.  I would have had a solid bone, yes it would have been shorter, so what!  It still is!!!  And I still have pain from it!  They still didn’t fix it.

And remember I was never told this.  I heard it all second-hand.  Not long ago, I tried to get my records from the Navy Hospital.  They said I needed my father’s authorization since he’s still alive.  If he was dead, it could even be harder from what I’ve heard.  I asked him to get them for me.  “For what, you don’t need that.”  I tried to explain, I’m having a lot of medical problems now and any information from my past might help my doctors now.  “I don’t believe that, it’s too much trouble.  I don’t know why you’re always wanting to bring up the past.”  Okay????  Where did that come from?  but I guess no medical records.

So my Lesson I Learned the Hard Way…Doctors do not know everything!  Doctors can’t always fix everything. and Doctors will Lie, or in this instance, at least keep things from you.

However, I have had them lie to me at different times….that was a Lesson Revisit.

Pinboard – #HAWMC Day 16

Today’s Prompt: Pinboard. Create a pinterest board for your health focus. Pin 3 things. What did you
pin? Share the images in a post and explain why you chose them.

I chose to pin a few more than 3 things, and probably could have done more.  However, I only pinned photos and artwork I created.  I chose these images because I felt they were closer to me and expressed what I wanted to say many times.

Here are the photo’s I shared on my Pinterest Board, titled, My Illnesses….pluses and minuses.

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What’s Your Style? #HAWMC Day 15

Today’s Prompt: Writing with Style. What’s your writing style? Do words just flow from your mind
to your fingertips? Do you like handwriting first? Do you plan your posts? Title first
or last? Where do you write best?

Is this my style??...What's my style???...
(distorted image of Mona Lisa by W. Holcombe)

I was recently talking with a friend about STYLE.  People who have it, those who don’t….and really, does it matter?  Does it change a person?  In writing, does it change the end result?  I wonder?

I have noticed the way I write has changed over the year.  Not where I write or how I start, but the words I use, the way I express myself..those things have developed I think.

But that wasn’t the question.

My writing style. For the most part, when I have things on my mind I want to talk about I sit down and just write.  Straight on the post.

I guess I plan a little, I always know some of what I’m going to say but usually my posts just flow from me.  I don’t normally hand write anything down first, unless I’ve had a lot on my mind, or I’ve been writing poetry.

The title is often the hardest for me.  For some reason I seem to think it needs to go first, but sometimes I change it before I post.

I always like to include an illustration.

I normally write in bed….or on the couch.  Always on my laptop.

When I’m writing a usual post I just write as if I were talking to a friend or group of friends sitting here with me.  I try to always be open and honest and write from the heart.

Is it a style?

I don’t know.  It’s just who I am.

Dream Day – HAWMC # 14

Today’s Prompt: My Dream Day. Describe your ideal day. How would you spend your time? Who
would you spend it with? Have you had this day? If not – how could you make it

My dream days now are much different from they used to be.

Today I take one day at a time.  If I have a good day, I try to make the most of it.

Falls Lake, Durham, NC
photo courtesy of http://www.city-data.com

The other day is a good example.  I woke up not feeling the greatest, but I rested, and in the afternoon it was nice and warm and I felt better.  So I asked my husband if we could take a ride that afternoon.  (I’m a very lucky person, my husband works at home and can work flexible hours.)  We decided it would be a nice day to take an afternoon ride with the top off my little yellow VW bug.  (even though I can no longer drive, we decided to keep my car as the family car because it gives me such joy.)  We went for a ride by the lake, and I saw a huge hawk which flew very close to the car.  It was a beautiful sight.  We drove through a little town and had a drink and snack and came home.  I got a bit too hot and we had to put the top up and turn the air on, but it was a lovely afternoon.  I didn’t feel well on the way home, but I hated for our afternoon to end.

Later, after we got home and I rested a bit, I was delighted that I felt better and was able to help with dinner.  Something I so rarely get to do, and I love to cook.  This day I was able to make nearly the entire meal with minimal help.  A good day indeed.

So this was a wonderful day.  A “dream” day.

photo from Hilton Garden Inn, Kitty Hawk, NC

It doesn’t have to be the perfect “dream” day to make me happy.  However, I still dream of going to the beach with my husband, I love the ocean.  Smelling sea air, feeling the ocean breeze and the warmth of the sun on my face, having long walks on the shore, and sitting on a porch reading as the sun disappears over the horizon.  Eating fresh seafood caught straight from the ocean, and return to our place with naughtiness on our minds…  Hopefully, days like that will happen again.  However, if they don’t, we are very determined to live every good day to the fullest.

Who knows on my next good day, it may be a day he has off, and we can actually take a picnic down to that lake, and take a little walk.  It may not be the ocean, but it would be a pretty body of water (and hubby loves the woods more than sand I think.)

I may be having a rough time with things right now, so I think it’s even more important to make sure to acknowledge every good moment, and celebrate every day…no matter if it’s a perfect “dream day” or not.

10 Things I could not live without – #HAWMC Day 13

This has always been a bad list for me.

Do I assume my necessities are taken care of, like food, water, shelter…ect?  Do I assume I have my husband and my pets?  Because if I need all of that, then there goes the 10 things right there!

I was once asked, “You were stranded on a desert island, you were allowed to take all your necessities, you forgot one important item, what would you freak out about?”   My first thought….”I hope it wasn’t my toothbrush!”   Strange thing, if I’m stuck and could only brush or floss, I’d floss.  so what was I thinking?  Take care of those gums!  Silly girl!  I guess I should have said, drinkable water, or something smart like that, but I kind of assume you could find that somewhere.  Am I naive?

So for this question, I’m going to assume I have everything that is necessary for life….I mean to sustain life.  And all my medications and such, including my hearing aid, and glasses. But only list those things I feel I couldn’t live without, even though technically I could.  (and I’m not including my loved ones, or my dental hygiene products, we know how I feel about that, I’m going to assume those are all included, this wouldn’t be much fun if all you read was a bunch of list about, oh I’d take my husband, my cat, my son……)….So let’s have more fun than that.  Yes I think I’ll be listing more, what semi-luxuries could I not live without!    (Please Note!  The Main thing in my life I could not LIVE without is my HUSBAND!  But anyone who knows anything about me, knows that!!)

In no particular order:

massage - photo image by http://www.laurawardmassage.com/
  • I said no particular order…but this one is NUMBER ONE!!   Massages from Kelly!  She has literally save me in many ways!  I honestly believe I would have had hip surgery again if it wasn’t for her, and I think my headaches, and neck pain would be much, much worse.  When we moved to Durham, I had to give up a wonderful massage therapist I was seeing because the drive was just too hard on me.  I went for a long time with no massages.  Then I decided to surprise my husband with a massage as a thank you gift for the amazing things he does for me.  We randomly found this place and randomly found Kelly.  She has researched my conditions, has worked with me, and come when I’ve needed.  She has gone way beyond what is expected of a massage therapist, and their prices are very reasonable.  I could not live without Kelly.
  • Hot Baths – often with Epsom Salts.
  • Ice Packs – for those really bad headaches
  • My emergency pack for when I have a Meniere’s Vertigo attack.- (filled with bottles of water, wash cloths, plastic bags, emergency meds, a card explaining what is happening….)
  • My cell phone for emergencies. – (we must be in a place where I have reception, and I can charge my phone, and I have the charger…no loop holes here OK?) I can’t talk on the phone any longer, but if I need help, it has an emergency button, or I can push one button and call my husband.
  • My computer, and a way to power it and hook it up to a network, and anything it needs with high-speed internet. (yes, I’m being thorough there, I’ve seen too many movies where people make a wish like, I want a computer, then have no way to run it.) – I must have access to the internet.  all my friends are in my computer.  : )
  • Monkey, Monkey, Monkey – or just Monkey to his friends.  Yes I have a stuffed animal who calms me when the Intracranial Hypertension or Meniere’s or pain from any of my chronic conditions – migraines, pelvic pain, GI issues….ect….   When any of this gets too much. Monkey is there to dry my tears to hold my head. to be a neck pillow, to just be my Monkey.
  • Peppermint Lotion. – OK, yes we are getting in to my luxuries now.  At night my hands and feet get very hot.  So I use peppermint lotion to cool them off, it helps me go to sleep.
  • Burt’s Bees Lip Balm….or possibly a different lip balm that has peppermint, I don’t really like that Burt’s Bees sold out to Clorox…ewww, but they are still made here in Durham, but they aren’t guaranteed gluten free any longer. However, I had a stock pile, so I think mine are still from the old manufacturing practices….anyone know of a good peppermint lip balm that is all natural and gluten free?  Oh but back to why this is a necessity…..I use it every night before I sleep, my lips are hot and dry, and I cannot fall asleep with them feeling like that, I just can’t…so I must have a peppermint lip balm.
  • Vick’s Mentholatum Vapor Rub – oh, yes I know this is an odd one.  But again, in my go to sleep routine.  I have a hard time with post nasal drip.  I will start coughing in my sleep, and making little hacking noises.  If I put a little of this under my nose, it usually takes care of it.  It opens my nasal passages and no more drip.  If I still have it, I take a Benedryl, and it’s all gone. But it’s wonderful that this makes it so I don’t have to take another pill a lot of the time.

You know I thought I’d have trouble with 10….but I could go on….however, I think I’d be going into the territory I said I wouldn’t.

Oh NO!  I didn’t mention any of my art supplies.  I could go NO WHERE without a drawing pad and pens!!! NO WHERE!!!  What to leave off????   Or do I assume that were in with the necessities of life?  They would be for me you know?

Now that will take some serious thought.

Wendy just write…. #HAWMC Day 12

Prompt for today Stream of Consciousness Day. Start with the sentence “_______”just write, don’t
stop, don’t edit.Post!

(written April 5th)

image courtesy of http://www.thechicagobridge.org/

“Wendy” just write, don’t stop, don’t edit. Post!

Stupid computer can’t figure out what I want to do Can’t get the dang program to close…ugh….can’t make a slideshow…I know I’ve done it before…why do I want to throw it out the window.

Heard from friend was nice, but it’s hard. Can’t do so much. Other friend told me I wasn’t a good friend because I didn’t keep in touch and didn’t make time for her when I was feeling good, she’s the busiest person I know, I looked back in my emails, the not getting together wasn’t all my fault..I apologized. A lot. But the reply I got back seemed so cold, so sterile. I just couldn’t put more of me out there…..not with everything, I just couldn’t. She wanted so much more than I could give. I want more..but when you can’t just chat on the phone, and people don’t like to email or take your written words wrong it’s so, so hard. And to see someone in their prime doing everything you will never be able to do and everything is about that, and all I can think about is my illness, what is left? I miss her…I miss them…but I have nothing….I really feel I have nothing to offer.  What can I offer.  I can’t even hear them to talk to them.  I focus on if I can get out of bed, brush my teeth, walk outside….maybe if I’m lucky a little more….what can I talk about to people who have a full life? a job, children, acitivites, friends, interests?  I’ve been so consumed with just staying alive the past 2 years. Well that’s stretching….Well no it’s not!

This past year I’ve been through so much…and I’ve persevered, and now I’m mad at me!!

I was told I was better, and would be better!!! Damn the doctors! How could they do that to me!

I had 5 months of a new life! A better life! No vertigo. I was moving on. I started to become a Foster Parent, I started to drive, I got a CAR! I was making a life….I didn’t think it would be ripped out from me.!  I was so busy….I didn’t think it would end…

After those 5 months I went through 7 more lumbar punctures SEVEN with 5 or 6 sets of patches down my spine. I spent about 6 months in bed with not only CSF problems but gut troubles too. I’ve gained nearly 60 lbs. I feel old, fat and ugly. I don’t like me any more….yet I do. I do. I’m proud of the way I’ve handled things.

I’ve had 2 in depth surgeries on my ears. Surgeries that took my ears almost completely off and drilled to my brain, and left holes in my skull the size of a 50cent piece.  But they worked…I think.
I’m now told I have high CSF pressure…Intracranial Hypertension. Serious, rare. My hearing in my “good” ear is almost gone.

Now I’m falling apart….and I’m angry at myself about it!!!?????

I’ve been so resilient, so adaptive, so….I can handle it.It may not be what I expected…so I’ll change what I expected…NOW….I’m just plain scared and mad.  I thought I was mad at everyone, I’m taking it out on everyone….But I’m so angry at me. I’m angry I’m not bouncing back, and I’m angry I’m not more tenacious, and I can’t do more and damnit….I’m angry that my body is doing this to me!  I’m angry I can’t lose weight….I’m MAD AS HELL!

I’m angry I’m sick! And I have to deal with it. I have been dealing with it. But right now…I’m not doing the best with that.  However, I know me, and I will. I’ll get it together, and get myself another lease on life.  Life is good.

I have such a good husband. It can’t be all bad. I must think of the good days.

My Sounds of Silence – #HAWMC Day 11

Today’s prompt, Theme song. Imagine your health focus or blog is getting its own theme song.
What would the lyrics be? What type of music would it be played to?

I happen to be losing my hearing due to Meniere’s Disease.  So music is very hard for me.  I can’t really hear it even with my hearing aid, sounds very tinny.  However, I have tinnitus all the time.  At this time I’m deaf in one ear, and have fluctuating loss in the other ear, the other day I was having a particularly low hearing day.  Deciding my hearing aid really wasn’t doing any good, I decided to just leave it out.  That day, I read this prompt.  I thought, I couldn’t have a song.  Then I thought, but even when I’m deaf I will hear sounds all the time.  NO, they won’t be sounds I want to hear, but I will hear sounds.

I talked with a friend of mine, Vincent Morrison,  who is a sound engineer.  He agreed to help me record something similar to what I hear every day. Please know, my tinnitus changes A LOT.  It varies constantly.  But these sounds always seem to be around.  We did put in some of the startling sounds that just come out of no where that scare me.  We didn’t make it as loud as it can be, I did want people to be able to listen to it.  I wanted to represent that my tinnitus can be softer, a medium tone, and I would say deafening…but that would be silly wouldn’t it?

So on a better hearing day, my dear friend came over and he tried his best.  I must admit I’m not the best person at describing sounds.  I am so touched to have this recorded.  Trying so long and so hard to explain just a little of what I hear has been so hard….this is my song.

“My Songs of Silence” – sound recording by Vincent Morrison

Artwork by Wendy Holcombe – “Fractured Ear”

Dear 16 Year Old Me – HAWMC Day 10

Me at 16.

**warning to readers….this is a graphic letter.  Things I really wish someone would have told me and helped me with, some may be offended by the frankness.  There may be some major mistakes in the writing, I tried to read it over, but just couldn’t.

Dear 16 year old me.

Hi Wendy….You won’t believe it, but I am now almost 50 years old.

I know you are confused. I know it’s hard to believe that I could be writing you from the future, but please just sit back and listen. I hope to help make these coming times just a little bit easier.   Please know, I love you, with all my heart.  You will go through times that you don’t like yourself very much, but know you will.  I’m just hoping you can start a bit sooner.

Recently you have been very depressed, and confused. Some days you are very happy, a bit euphoric even, and other days you don’t think you can carry on. Everyone thinks you are going though normal teenage hormones, just growing up. You are, but you are also dealing with a bit more. You need to make someone listen. Your mother has always been your best advocate. Sit down with her, talk honestly. Tell her just how depressed you have been and that you need to see a mental health professional.  I’ll be blunt, you have Bipolar disorder. Don’t worry, you can be treated. But hopefully, you can catch this much earlier than I did the first time around. In my time line you went through many hard years and many heart breaks. You still live with the fall out from those times. If you can get help now perhaps your life can go much smoother.   (much easier.)

If you can’t, there is one thing I suggest…STRONGLY.  Be careful with your sex life.  You will feel, once you are “soiled”, it isn’t worth the fight. It is. YOU ARE!  You will lose your self esteem. You will lose so much. When you get into therapy, finally, you will have a good therapist, but she will not understand. She will acknowledge your past problems with abuse and see you think a man will only care if you give yourself to him. She will say. Sex is ok, but only if you really want to do it. You will often feel that you really want to do it. Please Wait. Wait many times. Wait until the relationship is so much more. Do not jump into a sexual relationship until the relationship is more than just sex. Please take this more seriously than you can believe. It will change your life!!!

Stay close to your mother. Give her a break much more often than you do. Take her off the pedestal. She can’t read your mind, STOP being so passive aggressive. It carries on to other relationships and you don’t need that. You lose her much too early. She encourages you and stays by your side through everything, but unfortunately she doesn’t live to see you completely stable. Savor the years you have. You will be so very close, but you do put her through many worries. Try to lessen those for both of you.

You will start to have some health issues. Hearing issues, vertigo….you think you are having food poison many times…there are many breaks between these sicknesses. You are heading toward a hard fight with a hearing disorder that will cause a lot of balance issues. There really isn’t anything they could do if you found out earlier. So don’t sweat they you don’t find out until later. But if you find out earlier, it might help you in your career.

Dare to be braver. Work harder on your art if you REALLY want to. Don’t be so scared to fail. You will only have a few years to be able to work at this. So if you fail, it’s not a big deal.   But if you succeed, and I really think you could, think of how you would feel about you!  I believe in you.  Looking back, you could have done so much more.  Work on your muse!  Find what inspires you the most!  (oh and in college…start out as an Art Major. add in Art Education, but don’t waste time, if you do you will run out of financial aid before you know it and will not get the education you deserve.

You will have some health issues that change your life….so you change your life to go along with it.  You still have a good life.  You have a wonderful life, even with everything that you go through, you find a way to make your life meaningful.

You do meet the most wonderful man, and have a joyous life with him…but it won’t happen until you are in your late 30’s, you marry at 41. Do not worry. It happens. Don’t fret. And don’t think there is something wrong with you. Focus on your happiness.  This man will stand beside you through all your health issues.  You will have a better relationship than you ever thought imaginable.  He is worth waiting for.

Focus on YOU.

Study things you want to learn.
Dive into your ART.
Study Yoga…you will love it.
Become as healthy as you can, you will need it later.
Take care of you…And trust your heart…don’t listen to those who are just looking for fun for the moment.
Hopefully, if you listen to this, and get treated early, you will have an easier life.

Don’t take things so seriously….however, when you believe in something, don’t let others pull you away from your beliefs. In that same vein….do not get too caught up in other people’s beliefs without really looking into them. Make sure they are what you believe deep in your heart, and the that the facts are sound.

Question everything.
Love Deep.
Laugh Often.
And Cry Less.
Look for Beauty.
And appreciate Life.

From your future self, who hopes things turn out a bit differently.

With unconditional love, always and forever.



KEEP CALM AND CARRY ON a poster that was made to during World War II in Britain but was never used.  It was to be put up if full-scale invasion happened.  It never happened, so the posters were destroyed, well most of them.  You can read all about how a poster was found and the Calm-O-Matic was started here http://www.keepcalm-o-matic.co.uk/guide-to-keep-calm/

This prompt is very interesting.  We are asked to make a poster of our own, and possibly make it about our own illness.  Well, I have so many illnesses, I decided to make it more about a motto.

We all have bad days, and we all have good days, I think we should make sure to not take the good days for granted.  Every good day you have, do something you really want to do!  That doesn’t mean you have to run off and do something adventurous or over tire yourself.  If you really want to just relax and watch a movie, Do It!  If you want to sit in the backyard and enjoy the sun, Do It!  If you want to go for a ride with your husband and just enjoy being out of the house, as I often do, then do it!  All I’m saying is, do not continue to lie in bed on those days when you feel like you could move to the couch.  Do not stay on the couch when you feel you could walk outside.  If you love to cook, and think you could that night, go for it!  Make sure you have a back up in case you feel you are over doing it.

I promise even on those days you do a little too much, and you are a bit more tired or sore the next day, you will feel better that you accomplished something, and felt free for a little while.  (if you are as isolated as I often am, you know what I mean by feeling free)


May you have many, many Good Days!