My Sounds of Silence – #HAWMC Day 11

Today’s prompt, Theme song. Imagine your health focus or blog is getting its own theme song.
What would the lyrics be? What type of music would it be played to?

I happen to be losing my hearing due to Meniere’s Disease.  So music is very hard for me.  I can’t really hear it even with my hearing aid, sounds very tinny.  However, I have tinnitus all the time.  At this time I’m deaf in one ear, and have fluctuating loss in the other ear, the other day I was having a particularly low hearing day.  Deciding my hearing aid really wasn’t doing any good, I decided to just leave it out.  That day, I read this prompt.  I thought, I couldn’t have a song.  Then I thought, but even when I’m deaf I will hear sounds all the time.  NO, they won’t be sounds I want to hear, but I will hear sounds.

I talked with a friend of mine, Vincent Morrison,  who is a sound engineer.  He agreed to help me record something similar to what I hear every day. Please know, my tinnitus changes A LOT.  It varies constantly.  But these sounds always seem to be around.  We did put in some of the startling sounds that just come out of no where that scare me.  We didn’t make it as loud as it can be, I did want people to be able to listen to it.  I wanted to represent that my tinnitus can be softer, a medium tone, and I would say deafening…but that would be silly wouldn’t it?

So on a better hearing day, my dear friend came over and he tried his best.  I must admit I’m not the best person at describing sounds.  I am so touched to have this recorded.  Trying so long and so hard to explain just a little of what I hear has been so hard….this is my song.

“My Songs of Silence” – sound recording by Vincent Morrison

Artwork by Wendy Holcombe – “Fractured Ear”

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18 thoughts on “My Sounds of Silence – #HAWMC Day 11

  1. This is awesome Wendy! What a neat thing to do. I don’t know how I would describe my sounds either – so I know how you feel. Often when going to sleep at night my tinnitus kind of sounds like chirping birds – that likely sounds totally crazy to someone who has never experienced such things!!!

    • oh I can relate! the hammer sounding hitting on metal….randomly….I get that at night a lot. drives me in sane. I feel like there is someone making horse shoes down the road.

      I’m glad you think it was a good idea….it was actually a difficult project. w

  2. I have pet names for all my tinnitus sounds too; Old Ford Pick-Up, Broken Stereo Speaker (think you use that one too), Buzz and Warp-Speed. The first year I had Meniere’s I used to wake up with songs in my head. The doc said that it’s your brain’s way of trying to understand the sounds it’s hearing. That doesn’t happen much anymore. Guess my brain is used to it too. There’s a song by “Fat Boy Slim” (remember that guy?) where the sound gets muffled, then come back to normal. It’s a perfect example of what sound, sounds like when my hearing is going. I think having that example made my husband understand when I told him the tv sounds like it’s underwater. Your recording too is perfect to help people understand why when your tinnitus is bad, it’s impossible to pretend like it’s not there.

    • I’ll have to look up the Fat Boy Slim song. unfortunately, the Broken Speaker, is what my hearing is starting to sound like all the time lately.

      This was an interesting…and hard project, but I’m so grateful that I was able to do it….with a lot of help from my friend. and yes, often it’s just impossible to “tune it out”, or to hear someone talking over it….but it’s mine….I’ll live with it….like we have a choice huh? w

  3. This was enlightening! I have tinnitis, but I never thought about how to describe it to anybody. I’ll have to think on it. I don’t know how you sleep at all, lady! I go nuts with the erratic dryer flap pounding against the outside wall by my bedroom. Awk!! My tinnitis is just a steady high-pitched squealy sound that just goes up and down in volume but not blasting loud, so it is easier to ignore or drown out with music or the TV or my sound machine at night. This really helps me to be able to put myself in your shoes a little. Thanks for doing this. 🙂

    • I’m glad you could get through it. This is a pretty tame version really. I didn’t want people to start it and not be able to listen to it at all. but on some days it’s calmer…just not lately. : ) I hate that anyone has any kind of tinnitus. I’m sorry you have it too. w

    • I can’t imagine why it disappeared….we must track it down….the culprit must not get away with stealing your original comment! I will not have comments meant for me being swiped away! The blood hounds await!

      OK…yes I had a rough night, and am trying to be witty…didn’t work huh?

      Thank you…for your kind words…all of them, including those I cannot see. hehehe w

      • I think its the same gremlins, with their lair in the dug-out crawlspace beneath our house. They stockpile socks, pens, medications, important papers, notebooks and pads, and the like!
        Hope you have a better night tonight!

  4. What an amazing idea and a fabulous job communicating your sounds. What an incredible post this is and an amazing take on the prompt.
    I have had my inner ear and the hearing in my left ear affected by a stroke and have a hard time explaining that part of my experience. I don’t have tinnitus but certain pitches and noises create a very severe pain effect. Other sounds can cause me to loose my very shaky balance. A car horn when I am crossing a street can cause my balance to go and I fall to the ground,—– but I do pretty good when I am sitting still.

  5. I’m so impressed that you had this idea in the first place! I feel so funny putting on my high definition headphones that I use to blast music straight into my ears so that I can hear it, to listen to your “deaf sounds” (what I’ve always called it). I don’t have any of the tinnitis sounds that you have; mine sound almost like what you hear when someone puts a pitch fork onto the top of your head. I also hear gurgled-bickering (I always imagined it to be Sam Eagle from the Muppets bickering with his wife, lol). I definitely relate to the constant sound that is constant throughout- most of the time that is the loudest sound I hear. This has been so interesting! Thank you for sharing.

    • I hope with this some people realize that tinnitus is not the same for everyone. Often people hear the word and think it’s just a slight ringing in the ears, a little hum..and for some I’m sure it is, but for some of us, it’s crazy.
      These are just some of my sounds…I got a new one recently…it sounds like a Harley motorcycle. It’s horrible, glad it only comes in spurts.
      My constant sound is often my loudest sound too, drowning everything out. I have a lot of the same sounds, but they change, and it’s just hard to explain to someone who doesn’t experience it.

      I’m glad you liked the idea.
      and you probably heard it better than most. You heard it where certain sounds were in one ear, some in the other, and some in both (right?) that’s how it was recorded. And how it’s heard.

      hope things are well with you.
      thank you for sharing your descriptions with me.
      w

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