Is it over yet? Hope for a New Year.

Writing this is causing me a lot of pain, so bare with me.

Is 2020 really over? Funny, I still feel the same.

Maybe after January 20th, when our new president takes office I’ll feel different. I’m sure I’ll feel better mentally and emotionally, but physically, not so much.

The nerve pain is excruciating. I wake up each morning in such severe pain I pray to die. However, I do have a little bit of hope that things will get better. I started seeing a physical therapist last week who specializes in nerve pain. He says my nerves are lit up like a Christmas tree. Yup, I believe it. We aren’t sure why, there could be numerous reasons, or no reason at all. I only know that it is the worst pain that I could ever imagine. If you have been following my blog for a while, you know I’m no stranger to severe pain. The medication, gabapentin, isn’t working any more. and I don’t know if increasing the dose would do any good. My physical therapist is helping me calm the nerves down. He said all of my pain is connected. My migraine, back pain, and this horrendous pain in my arms and hands, all connected. He believes we can get it better, but it will take a long time. Unfortunately, until then typing causes such severe pain I simply can’t do it for long. I’m wring this a sentence at a time, then I have to rest. But……

I have hope.

I think hope is what got us through this past year, and will continue to get us through until we can all get back to normal.

Until typing no longer causes so much pain, I won’t be here much. Please know, I will be back as soon as I’m able, and I miss you all.

May this year be filled with love, and hope.

8 thoughts on “Is it over yet? Hope for a New Year.

    1. Thank you Patricia. I have been using the mic on my phone when able, but often there are so many errors it takes a lot to fix it. But I’m still trying. 💕
      I hope the new year is good to you.

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  1. I have hope for you too, if that helps. The physical therapist sounds like he knows his stuff; I hope he can help you reach a breakthrough that is a breakaway from your pain.
    I suppose a voice to type device/program is not a possibility right now. I know that these can make lots of mistakes, but at least you won’t need to type? I dictate onto my phone — you’ve seen the silly things it thinks I’ve said. If nothing else, voice to type can provide a smile or an outright laugh.
    I imagine you’ve tried lyrica and found it was a troublesome drug. Not every one can take it; it does help with my nerve related pain.
    I can imagine how all your pain is interconnected — certainly my neck and face pains feed off each other.
    Guess your implants make other devices a no-go. And, not all are “right:” my sil had to have the one in her back removed.
    Just thinking aloud. And sending you very gentle hugs. Soft, like a butterfly landing on you.
    If there is any thing I can do to help . . . please just ask.

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  2. gentle hugs I’m so sorry you’re struggling right now. You inspire me with your bravery and your strength and I know how easy it is to want to just give up, but I am glad you’re here and working through the pain. Sending you love and light!

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  3. Wendy, Didn’t respond earlier, been in a purple funk again. I don’t know how you deal with this everyday. My list of problems have been growing, and I am getting sick of filling out forms, talking to doctors, and never feeling better. Would you like to talk on the phone someday?? I’ll send you my phone number on messenger. Please take care my friend. Mo

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