My Normalcy During Pandemic 2020

A Roadrunner, Quail, and Hare have all come to visit me recently. Their world hasn’t changed at all.

I’m so incredibly lucky, my life really hasn’t changed all that much during this craziness, yet, it has.

We’re lucky, no one close to us have lost their jobs or anything like that. It really breaks my heart for all who have and continue to each day. I don’t have anyone close to me who is on the front-lines treating people, I’m so very thankful to these amazing people. I really don’t think I’ll know just how much this has really affected my life until it’s all over and we find out what businesses have survived and things like that. I’m desperately worried for these people. I’m helping all I can, ordering from local sites online, buying gift cards…, but will it be enough?

For me personally, I don’t normally go many places during the week, to doctor appointments, that’s about it. Well that was about it until recently. Recently I started getting more involved in my neighborhood; I was going to Women’s Coffee on Tuesdays and a Women’s Empowerment Journaling/Discussion Group on Thursdays. On the weekend we’d cram in everything else, grocery shopping, seeing dad, entertainment…ANYTHING else! Of course, all of this changes if I’m not feeling well, so things change a lot. I guess that’s why I don’t feel that things have changed all that much, because I’m used to things being canceled. I’m used to staying home, I’m used to not being able to do things I’d like to do, so that part of things isn’t really that stressful for me. But it’s different when you have to do these things and when you are forced to do them.

Truthfully, things really haven’t changed that much though.

I have still been going in for my SPRAVATO treatments twice a week, I start once a week this week. And it has been amazing! First let me assure everyone that we are extremely cautious. I’m the first patient seen, the room is completely sterilized, I only see one person, and they never touch me. Now for the results, as I’ve told you before, my depression is gone! I do feel sadness, but it’s not the same. Sadness is situational and it feels different, oh so different. I never knew just how different it felt. What I haven’t shared is how different my migraines are! I had TWELVE migraine free days last month!! And so far I’ve had 9 free this month! Did I say AMAZING?? Understatement huh? So, let’s cross our fingers it stays this way now that I’m going down to once a week.

I still see some of my neighborhood friends, just from a distance. We have “6 foot plus” patio visits. A couple of us will meet on our patios sitting 6 feet plus apart and just visit for an hour or two. It’s so nice to have a little bit of normalcy in this craziness. I admit I’m upset that as soon as I start feeling well enough to get involved and make new friends I’m sidelined by something that has nothing to do with me, but it is forcing me to take it slower, and that might be a good thing.

Stuart working from home seems weird. Even though he did it for seven years, I was really sick then, now that I’m not as sick, and I got used to him not being here, it’s harder having him around all the time. Well, not hard really, just weird, but it is kind of nice too. Now that he has finally gotten off the dining room table and has his office set up it’s much nicer! Plus, he doesn’t have to add in travel time to go to or from work!

I’m trying to spend more time in my studio, but I haven’t found that I’m actually creating more, I’m just hanging out in there. I’m enjoying that a lot though. I go in there and sort through emails and organize stuff and think of things I want to do and plan things…..But actually paint or anything, yeah, I haven’t done much of anything. I don’t know why. I’ll get there. It’s been a while.

Yes, our weekends are different. However, we are still seeing dad if we can. We take him his groceries on Sunday. (Stuart shops for groceries during the week, not on the weekend, that’s just crazy. He says there are still so many people there with no masks or anything just leisurely shopping. WTH?) We also take him lunch or dinner and spend some time with him. We are the only people he sees. We eat with him way on one end of the table and us on the other. It’s quite funny trying to maneuver the house and stay 6 feet apart, but we do a pretty good job. When we were there yesterday he finally talked a little about Margaret’s death and Stuart’s mom’s death, he doesn’t show his emotions normally and doesn’t talk about those kinds of things, I was very pleased to hear him talk about it. It has to be so hard on him. I’m so glad we are able to see him, at least a little, now. He wouldn’t allow us to come see him for a long time, he’d only allow Stuart to come drop off his groceries. It really takes a load off my mind to be able to see and talk to him.

We are trying to do some walking around the neighborhood. I’m trying to do a bit of yoga and more meditation. We put stuffed animals in our windows for the kids to see, and I put a painting in the window just to share prettiness. A lot of people in my neighborhood are doing the same. We are also doing sidewalk art. I haven’t gotten mine done yet, I just got some sidewalk chalk! When I do I’ll take a picture. I will admit I’m eating very poorly, that needs to change.

How many of you have gained weight during all of this?

What are you doing differently?

How are you dealing with how things have changed?

8 thoughts on “My Normalcy During Pandemic 2020

  1. Sounds like you are doing well! Happy you are continuing with treatments and they seem to be helping, that is wonderful news πŸ™‚
    Neither of us have work right now, that has been difficult and weird. I’m being forced to deal with my mental health with all this down time. I’ve actually lost weight as a result of nerves. Not much has changed in the fact that I’m a homebody, so I actually like not working, my bank account disagrees though!

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    1. I haven’t worked in years, I couldn’t commit to anything like that. I’m in awe of people with chronic illnesses who can. I’m so very grateful I don’t have to. And very grateful Stuart can work from home.
      I know it has to be incredibly difficult for you right now if neither of you are working, you have the fear of lost income on top of dealing with your mental health right now.
      I’m gaining weight, I’d be happy to share mine with you. πŸ˜„
      How is your pain? I hope you can get in for more ketamine treatments. I know it helped.
      Remember I care.
      And I’m here to listen any time. πŸ’•πŸ’•

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      1. Thank you for your thoughtfulness πŸ™‚ The pain has been keeping at bay, I think in part because I’m not working, so that is something positive to look at. I’m so thankful that I’m able to walk outside and feel good! My mind is the the thing that hurts now hahaha!

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        1. I’m so grateful the pain is better, at least right now. One thing to deal with at a time is enough! 😁 Just because it’s your mental health that hurts right now doesn’t make it less painful though, some people don’t get that. I do. It sucks. Keep painting those rocks! That’s some good medicine. 😊 ❀️ I think I’ll paint some myself. πŸ˜œπŸ’•

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  2. I’m so happy to hear the treatments are helping! You fought so hard for those! It’s been weird here too. I’m not allowed out except for once a month pain doc apts. My husband is working from home, and I’m so grateful this hasn’t affected his job! My daughter just started online schooling, so we’re adjusting. Our biggest obstacle has bee finding toilet paper!
    gentle hugs I miss you my friend!! ❀

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  3. I am so happy to hear you are doing a little better. For once I am on the other side of the fence, still working one job. Second on hold. I am considered essential. On the flip side, trying to get my mother to understand I should not be going to the store every weekend or during the week is not going well. I have a couple friends who I met up with at the river six feet apart of course for fresh air and a break from my mother. I am resting, I dont have much energy when I get home to create. Hopefully this weekend.

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  4. Yay! Did I say YAY!!! Depression in remission and migraines not getting every day from you! Your outings and patio visits sound necessary and helpful. We all have to get through this! Social distancing… I actually kind of like, especially in WalMart! Ha! Yes I’ve gain weight from sheer boredom. Life isn’t a whole lot different, chronic illness makes you isolate… never will I take being able to go OUT for granted ever again! Bummed we had to call off our lunch meeting… still BUMMED!!! Safety first tho- πŸ’œ

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